Sunday, August 18, 2019

From homeschool to college at 16

I knew this day would come, but truthfully, I spent zero time thinking about it because every single moment of every day was filled with so much to do.
I haven't had a minute to sit and think of what this day would look like--the day that I pack up all of the homeschool materials, and say goodbye to my job.

My little boy has grown into a young man, and at 16, he has tested into a program that allows high school students to earn an Associate degree at the community college in their final two years of high school.

I feel validated. He feels validated. This has been the goal for a couple of years, and now it feels as if we've made it. Of course now the hard work begins. College is not fun and games all the time, but I sure hope he meets some cool people who want to learn as much as he does. I have so many hopes for him, but mostly I hope he finds his path, and that he never lets anyone tell him he can't do something that he really wants to do.

Despite second guessing myself, worrying that I wasn't doing enough, pushing my child enough, or backing off enough, or allowing him to learn on his own enough, or insisting that he learn certain information enough, despite me, he learned just fine.

In fact, last year he confessed that he just didn't want to do it anymore. He didn't want to follow any sort of curriculum, and instead wanted to learn completely on his own.  So, mostly, that is what he did. I waited for him to come to me for resources, and I checked in with him daily to ask what he had worked on the day before.

Every day we spent hours talking. We do a lot of driving, so there's a lot of car time to talk.
If I had to boil down what I believe has been the best teaching/learning tools for him, I'd say other people, and his own research.

Really.

I mean, me, of course, to a certain extent, because I am open to talking about anything, for as long as he wants to talk about it. I do think that parents who talk to their kids are giving their children an opportunity to learn in ways that other children don't.

That was a huge part of what we did for school. A lot of current event discussions, because that was his interest. Justice. Race. The Constitution. Government.
All of that was important, and I believe it has helped shape him into a person who has critical thinking skills.

Also, getting out in groups of kids at the YMCA PE program, and going to piano lessons for a couple of years, and art class at the library, and spending time with the wonderful young man from Guatemala who worked with him on Spanish.

Interacting with adults, and kids of all ages in the art and PE programs gave him a different perspective on all sorts of things.

Another major learning tool- and I know this is controversial for some (because I hated it for years) is online gaming. Through gaming he has met so many kids from all over the world. They talk politics, social issues, world issues, and goof off. I think through talking to them he was given a spark to research some subjects, intrigued enough by what they were doing in math to find out how to do it, and talking to them about what they were learning in history, etc. backed up his desire to learn at home, because they weren't learning nearly enough at school, in his opinion.

His own research has been the best curriculum. I used Montessori philosophy and materials in the beginning, and I'm so glad that I did, because it was structured, yet he was free to go at his own pace. It trained me to trust him, and it worked. Later on, when I was trying to cobble together a curriculum, and materials, because we were past the Montessori stuff, I began to doubt myself. I knew he was capable, and I had read and heard people talk about unschooling, but I still wondered if it was all really going to work out.

Having unfettered access to the Internet has given him a depth of knowledge that I never had at his age. Having podcasts, videos, and youtube has been unbelievable. I confess that at first I was worried. So much of what is online isn't true, or real, or vetted. So, I can see how this type of learning could be just a jumbled up mess of confusion for some kids.

Sean is good at filtering the information. He can spot something that isn't sourced, something that sounds like propaganda, or biased information. He listens to all sides of an issue, and forms his own opinion. He has always been confident in his own views, yet willing to admit when he gains new insights that change his mind. He also feels comfortable confronting friends if he feels they are basing their views on bad information.

We used the library quite a bit, too. He just recently had an in-depth conversation with his father about how engines work. Later he told me he remembered all of that from a book he read from the library.

To say I am proud would be an understatement. I am so proud of all three of my children, but Sean is the only one who has learned at home, and he has definitely shown me that self-directed education works.

So, to anyone reading this who is unsure of self-directed education, or homeschooling in general, I hope this helps you relax.

I feel good about the projects we did, the field trips we went on, and the people he met through the years of homeschooling. I have some great memories of it all, and I don't regret any of it. It has been some of the most fulfilling work I've ever had the pleasure to do.

And now, once he gets his legs under him in college, I'll change jobs. I've already got some ideas of what I'll do next.

If you have questions, feel free to leave a comment with a way to respond to you. I'm happy to share any information about Montessori homeschooling, unschooling, self-directed education, or to just be that person who listens. Not all days are good days in homeschooling, but there are more of them when you feel confident in what you and your child are doing.